The Technology Conspiracy

How many of you have had this happen to you? You sign up for your preferred internet provider or your preferred TV provider and it all goes something like this:

"Because we so appreciate you signing up with us, we're going to reward you with all of those wonderful rebates. Now, your bill is so low, we're almost paying you to be our customer!"

One year later...

Me: "Yes, hello to you in India, hope the weather's fine. Why the heck has my bill doubled since last month?"

Employee from India: "sdoifn siodng wedgis dgfsokdg."

Me:"Sorry, didn't get any of that?"

Employee from India: "You. webates. have. wun. out."

Me: "Seriously? How does that happen exactly?"

And, then, they take you on this carousel ride about why the rebates have run out or why the bill is higher, and the common denominator from all of these calls is that it's somehow my fault. After a while I'm so dizzy from all the talking in circles and have such a headache from straining to try and understand the person I'm listening to, that I just raise the white flag and agree to pay whatever my bill has risen to if they'll just take $10 a month off and promise to go to English language classes.

This little process is so irritating to me! Maybe I am supposed to know that my bill is going to increase after a year, I don't know. I mean, people, it was a year ago. I can't even remember what I had for dinner last night, OK? My other favorite is when they do remember to tell you that your bill will increase in a year, but you can call back and ask for more rebates or specials or whatever after the year. This you do, and they tell you, "Oh, yes ma'am, we can take $10 off your bill for 6 months starting with the next billing cycle." Uh-huh. And now my bill is still $30/month higher and I'm supposed to be happy?

Why can't they just lower their rates by about a third and keep them the same for the length of your contract? I mean, I think they'd make about the same amount of money, right? Plus, I wouldn't be so mad and want to change providers all the time AND I probably wouldn't have migraines.

And, do people in India even know what cable TV is?

My take is this: It's all just a racket, I tell you! What's this world coming to, anyway? I think I'll start collecting can goods and go live in an RV, things are so bad...

There, I feel better now.

What's your take?